Dogtopia

Would you look at this, Friends? I’m posting 2 days in a ROW. I know, I know. I impress myself too. But I have to say, I may be overcompensating for a ruff morning. Well, not exactly RUFF. More like pleasantly DISORGANIZED.

First of all – MAD props to all the human moms (and dads) out there, who regularly manage to get ready for work and drop the kid(s) at daycare or school. I know you do it every day, and on a schedule too! I thought of you warmly while I fumbled through Sproutie’s 1st trip to Dogtopia for her Meet & Greet. Well, maybe more like luke-warmly, but you get the idea – RESPECT.

For those of you who don’t know Dogtopia, it’s a boarding, daycare, playpark, grooming facility where pups can go to socialize and have fun with other pups. I had to wait until she had her spay surgery (the World isn’t quite ready for baby Sprouts and neither am I) before she could take part in the festivities, but I’ve been looking forward to a positive interaction with her peers.

If you know Sproutie, you know she LOVES people and has to say hello to every person she sees. Her besties are her Blue Shirt Friends at PetSmart, where she’s been offered employment as an Honorary Greeter, but she doesn’t discriminate. For the amount of time and money we spend there, we should probably start leaving our toiletries and toothbrushes.

Anyway, I’m not quite sure how she’ll do at Dogtopia. She aced her Meet & Greet with the Front Desk, but Moms aren’t permitted backstage. That said, they DO have cameras where we can watch the playrooms on a mobile app. And they’re supposed to send pictures around lunchtime. Things have come a long way in the daycare realm, even for dogs. Thank goodness this kind of technology didn’t exist when I was babysitting, but I digress.

So I posted yesterday about the dogma a Dog Ma is subjected to, and let me tell you, daily life in Dogtopia is no exception. I was grateful to be dropping off without an audience. Yes, we were running a little late (though early for a Saturday in my book), but I felt strong when an equally disheveled dog mom came in with her 3 month old. That was before she hung herself with a leash for forgetting her baby’s lunch, and I realized I hadn’t brought Sproutie’s (I was supposed to bring lunch??) either.

Then I decided to confess that Sproutie is house-trained (meaning she goes to the potty IN the house) and may not know how to ask for outdoor pee places. Yet another thing I hadn’t thought of, so I was more than relieved when the Dogtopia employees told me all the dogs are expected to “relieve” themselves on the indoor/outdoor play floor (SCORE!). Anyway, I left feeling good when none of us cried, and I’m only having marginal separation anxiety while book hoarding and hibernating at the Barnes & Noble.

After splurging on 3 new books, an Irish Cream Cold Brew, and a cookie (don’t judge me – it’s my Birthday), I figured I would check out some camera footage on Dogtopia TV. I scanned the rooms and had a hard time locating Sproutie at first. Then I saw her streak by in her Birthday Suit. I didn’t realize they would undress her, so I hope she wasn’t too embarrassed to get some skin in the game. From what I can see, she’s not exactly a Kardashian on the social scale, but I don’t think we’ll take her off the air just yet.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to find my own pee places before I pick up the girl. They said she’s getting a report card and I’m already a bit nervous. She’s not exactly Miss Manners. And if we’re being honest, we’d probably have a hard time keeping a human daughter off the pole. Happy Saturday, Y’all. – L.